Lost Connections: A Journey of Emotional Turmoil and Self-Discovery

This story is narrated by Rashika's friend. The characters and events are entirely fictional. Please Give it a read.

"Hello everyone,

Today, I'm here to share the story of my friend, Rashika. Rashika is a girl with an incredibly cute smile and pretty eyes who loves to live a joyful life. She finds joy in nature, traveling, and spending time with her friends.

Recently, Rashika completed her 12th board exams, and I must say, she is a hardworking individual, which I have personally witnessed. However, after the exams, she found herself in a state of confusion regarding her career path. Initially, she chose to study biology in 12th grade because she aspired to become a doctor. But being an emotional girl, she couldn't bear to see others in pain, leading her to decide against pursuing NEET preparation. Instead, she longed for a life filled with adventure. 

It was quite challenging for Rashika to make a decision. She was a member of a NEET group on a Facebook page and once asked about the NEET cutoff in the group. Many people responded to her query, including a guy named Ahaan. This was the first time Rashika had heard his name.

Ahaan caught Rashika's attention when he corrected someone in the comments section who had written "BC" instead of "OBC." He politely requested, "Bro, please correct this from BC to OBC." Later, Ahaan messaged Rashika directly, suggesting that she consider taking a gap year for NEET preparation. However, Rashika expressed that she didn't want to become a doctor. When Ahaan asked about her interests, she shared her passion for pursuing a career in the arts. She mentioned her love for craft and her aspirations to travel in the future, but for now, she desired to study at a reputable college.

 

Ahaan became a great source of motivation for Rashika. He wrote several paragraphs, encouraging her. As time went on, Rashika started developing feelings for him. However, she chose not to confess her feelings because she didn't want things to become complicated. When Ahaan flirted with her, she decided to ignore his messages and told him not to call her since she wasn't comfortable with phone conversations. Coming from a small town, Rashika was afraid of getting involved in such type of things.

Rashika informed her father about her career choice, and he was extremely supportive and respectful of her decision. Encouraged by her father's positive response, Rashika decided to apply for the DU BA program in fine arts. Over the course of two years, Ahaan and Rashika continued talking and became good friends. However, Rashika always yearned for his messages. Whenever he messaged her, it brought a smile to her face. Despite her shyness, Rashika never revealed her feelings to Ahaan because they were from different states, and she didn't see the point in confessing her affection.

 

Unfortunately, in Ahaan's second year, he started ignoring Rashika. Whenever she texted him, he responded coldly, which hurt Rashika deeply. She couldn't understand what had happened and why he had changed so much. Determined to find out, she texted him, asking how he was doing. Ahaan replied with a simple "fine," and they had a brief conversation. Rashika mustered the courage to ask if he had a girlfriend now, and Ahaan confirmed that he had a gf now, going on to share details about their relationship and how they met in college.

 

As Rashika read his messages he was telling about his girlfriend, she couldn't hold back her tears. Despite her emotions, she messaged him, expressing her happiness for him. She had developed deep attachments to people and things, making it incredibly difficult for her to forget him. Rashika eagerly waited for his messages, but he never initiated the conversation. Still, every 3 to 6 months, she would text him, asking about his well-being. Unfortunately, he always responded with cold replies. It hurt Rashika a lot, and she would often call me, asking if she should message him again. I always advised her with a firm "NO," explaining that he didn't want to be friends anymore. I encouraged her to stop thinking about him. It took Rashika two years to finally move on from this emotional turmoil. While she was hurt by Ahaan behaviour, she understood that people change and nothing stay same.

Rashika, an overthinker, found herself deeply impacted by her online conversations with Ahaan, despite never having met him in person. Ahaan's words and motivation resonated with her, providing comfort and inspiration. Even though they hadn't met face-to-face, their virtual connection had a meaningful impact on Rashika's thoughts and feelings. It's strange to me how someone you've never met can have such an impact on you.

In college, everyone seemed to be either finding a partner or trying to break free from their own problems. That's when we discovered Bumble, a dating app that Rashika and I decided to try out. 

Rashika easily grew frustrated with the app, constantly swiping left on profiles without even looking at them. I wasn't sure what she was searching for, but she seemed to swipe left on about 12-15 profiles without giving them a chance. She did talk to a few guys, but none of them captured her interest or were as interesting as Ahaan. She went on a few dates but ended up putting everyone in the friend zone. 

Rashika, after her experience with Ahaan, started developing crushes on guys in college. However, she noticed that these crushes would fade away quickly, usually within 10 or 20 days. She realized that these infatuations were often based on superficial qualities and appearances, causing her interest to wane after a short period of time.

Rashika believed in making connections and forming crushes or friendships online because she felt that she could talk to them about anything without fear of judgment. After a couple of attempts, she deleted her Bumble account, thinking it wasn't worth it. However, one day, the thought of Ahaan crossed her mind, and she decided to make a her account on bumble again.

 

This time, she created a very interesting bio for herself, one that was funny and playful. The bio read, "Text me back only if you'd like to watch the sunset together and go on a museum date; otherwise, don't bother."

With her new account, Rashika swiped left more often than right. She sent a casual "hey" to one guy, and the response she received caught her attention. He replied, "Hey girl, if I were in your city, I would take you to see the sunset right away. But for now, I'll wait for that day." Intrigued, Rashika carefully checked his profile and bio. He seemed like an extroverted person, which excited her because she, too, was an extroverted girl. This was the first time she was talking to someone who was three times more extroverted than her. He fully captivated her attention.

His name was Divyansh, and he was studying engineering at ICT Mumbai University. Meanwhile, Rashika was pursuing her master's degree in MA from DU.

At first, Rashika hesitated to share her phone number, but Divyansh's extroverted nature convinced her otherwise. They exchanged numbers, and she received a message from him saying "Yo!" She replied with a simple "Hi," and he asked for her full name. Curious, she asked why he needed it, and he explained that he saved names with full names. She introduced herself as Rashika Sharma, and he complimented her name.

 

That night, they engaged in a conversation about various random topics. Divyansh shared small details about him and even showed Rashika a picture of his room wall. Intrigued, Rashika reciprocated by sending a picture of her own creatively decorated room. Divyansh was amazed by its beauty and expressed his admiration. They discovered a shared passion for traveling, and Divyansh shared his travel experiences while Rashika attentively read his messages, as she had always been interested in hearing about others' trips. 

Divyansh's energy was contagious, and Rashika could feel it in the voice notes he sent her. She asked him how he managed to maintain such high energy, to which he replied, "With you, it never goes down." Rashika couldn't help but smile and playfully called him "stupid." Although they hadn't talked on a call yet. Rashika found Divyansh to be cute and charming. It had been a long time since she had seen such a genuine smile on her face while talking to someone.

 

They talked continuously for almost two months, enjoying each other's company, but one day Divyansh didn't message her at all. The next two days were the same, and Rashika started worrying that she was being ghosted like what happened with Ahaan in the past. She decided to text Divyansh and asked how he was doing. Divyansh replied with a simple "Hi, doing fine." That was the extent of their conversation for that day. Rashika didn't receive any messages from Divyansh side for the next five days, and it was frustrating for her. She mustered up the courage to text him again, saying that “I felt you are bored with me, She also mentioned that receiving cold replies and being ghosted hurt me, if there is anything like this please let me know.” However, Divyansh had his read receipts turned off, and he didn't reply to her message all day. I saw my friend crying and overthinking the situation, and it hurt me to see her like that. She kept checking her phone repeatedly but didn't receive any response. The next evening, she finally received a message from Divyansh side saying that he was busy and it wasn't like she thought. Rashika replied with an "okay, If you say so."

 

I feel sorry for my friend, and I can't even lie. Maybe she did not overthink that much if he did only one text but he took 36 hours to text her back. It seems that some people don't have an emotion and don't respect other people's feelings. 

 

After that incident, Rashika didn't text Divyansh. After five days, she received a message saying "Yo!" from his side. Rashika replied excitedly with a "Hi" because she had started liking him and was waiting for his response. He then said, "I miss you." Rashika didn't reply to that. They had a brief conversation, and Rashika opened up to him about her fear of being ghosted and how she disliked it when people's behavior changed. She told him about Ahaan and how it took her four years to move on from that experience. She didn't want to go through something like that again. Divyansh replied, apologizing if she felt that way and suggesting they stop talking if she thought he was ghosting her. He said goodbye, take care, and have fun.

 

Rashika didn't expect such a reply from him, and it was painful for her. She didn't know what to say anymore. Divyansh stopped talking, but Rashika blamed herself and overthought the situation. She wondered if she had done something wrong or if she shouldn't have said what she did. How could she make her understand that if someone wants to leave, you can't stop them? It's been a month, and she's still thinking about him. She decided to text him again, setting aside her ego, and ask “why he did that and why he got stuck in her mind”. Divyansh replied, apologizing and saying “it wasn't his intention. He suggested meeting when he came to Delhi this month”.

 

After a week, Divyansh texted Rashika, saying he was coming to Delhi and was on the train. Rashika replied a few minutes later, and they decided to meet another day in the afternoon. Divyansh sent her some links of places they could visit and seemed excited. However, Next day she didn't receive any further messages from him, even though she was waiting for his reply. She texted him, asking “he was coming or not”, but he didn't reply. Rashika was angry and went to Sundar Nursery alone. At 6 pm around, she received a call from Divyansh, asking where she was. He had completely forgotten about their meeting and was in Connaught Place. Rashika was angry but still agreed to meet him. They met in CP, and she saw that his friend was there too, even though he hadn't told her about it. She felt uncomfortable. They roamed around CP, and they all went to Delhi Gate. Rashika was angry because she realized that Divyansh had remembered to meet his friend but had forgotten about their plans and failed to inform her. Moreover, Divyansh used abusive language while talking to her. While crossing the road, Divyansh was too absorbed in sending voice notes to someone on Whatsapp, she was like “he sends his voice note to everyone with that energy, how stupid I’m, who thinks he send me only” and Divyansh completely ignoring the fact that Rashika was walking behind him. It was already 9 pm at night, but he showed no concern for Rashika's presence. Rashika managed to hold back her tears and made the decision to leave that place. She told Divyansh that she didn't feel like continuing and he simply said, "Okay."

 

I was waiting for Rashika at the metro station, and when she arrived, she hugged me tightly and started crying. She said I’m not a bad girl who deserve to be treated like this. She realized that no girl should be treated this way. That day, Rashika felt terrible, and it made me realize that you can't truly know someone in just 2-3 months and not even 2-3 years. It was difficult for her to stop thinking about all of this. She wanted to talk to Ahaan again, but she didn't. Rashika knows her self-worth and self-respect, which should come before any guy. She now understands the value of her time and won't waste it on anyone.

I didn't mention anything about myself, I’m Vani. Rashika and I made our Bumble account together. We both matched with some guy, went on some dates, and eventually I entered into a relationship. However, after 10 months, I discovered that he had created a new account on Bumble without informing me. One of my friends saw his profile and informed me about it. When I confronted him, he claimed that his friend had made the account and not him. Later, when I texted him for a simple conversation, he suddenly said that he thinks we should break up because we are not compatible with each other, even our movie preferences didn't match. And I was wondering that he realised this thing after 10 months that our movie preferences are different. It's painful for me, but I'm trying to move on from this situation. Despite not being an overthinker like Rashika, it still affects me. However, the lesson learned from all of this is not to waste our emotions on unworthy people. We were naive girls who believed in fairy tale love, but unfortunately, it doesn't exist.

Rashika completed her master's degree, moved to Nainital, and started her small craft and hostel startup. She also enjoys traveling and is trying to focus on herself instead of relying on someone else. She put a quote on the gate of her hostel that says, " Dear Traveller, Enter this hostel if you respect people, if not, kindly choose another path." Thank you."

 

Disclaimer: The story shared above was written by Sadhna Diwakar and is a fictional narrative created for the purpose of entertainment. The characters, events, and situations depicted in the story are purely fictional and any resemblance to real individuals or events is purely coincidental.